Saturday, February 27, 2010

Second Chance

So today I was woken up by my handsome hazel eyed husband, asking me "shouldnt you be at school". I almost had a heart attack b/c if your late, your dropped from the class. So, i pretty much broke down and started crying. This class is my future! So, Mike being the amazing man that he is, gave me an ounce of hope and encouraged me to get ready anyways and head up there. I finally got up there an hour later, she dismissed my absense and sent me to my unit for the day to start training. I was put in the subacute unit, which is foul-smelling, and is the hardest hall in the whole facility to work at in my opinion. As a CNA i am not able to talk about the patients, because of confidentiality. But I will tell you, it was one of the most difficult jobs i have ever done. I feel so bad for those patients. Most of them have tracheal's, and are bedridden.It was definitely a life changing experience. Just to see first hand what can happen as a result from accidents, health problems, or other incidents that lead to that outcome. Very sad. I personally never want to make it into a senior facility, or any care facility for that matter. I almost want to go get a 'do not resuscitate' tattoo over my heart, or atleast go get the legal documentation so there's no confusion if there is ever anything to happen to me. Sigh* - As I notice things around me in the CNA field, it gives more meaning to living everyday like its your last, and not to take life for granted. I for one, will never again complain about the little things.

quote for today:
When something does not insist on being noticed,
when we aren't grabbed by the collar or struck on the skull by a presence or an event, we take for granted the very things that most deserve our gratitude
By: Cynthia Ozick

Saturday, February 20, 2010


Mike told me on the way home tonight from Yucca that he is thinking about extending to go to Afganistan with the guys in October. Im always going to stand behind him no matter what his choice is, but deep down i really dont want him to go to that dangerous place. I know he is one of the best in his MOS and he'll do fine over there. But in the back of my mind im thinking what iff... and that scares me the most. I married him knowing this is the life we live. As much as it hurts me to agree to this, im very proud of him for wanting to go with the guys and make sure they all come home safely. I am strong enough for this life, but are our kids going to understand why daddys gone? He's got a really tough choice to make. To get out in October, or stay in and go to Afganistan. Which would most likely lead to re-enlisting another 4 years. && we both know that seals the deal to being a lifer. im ok with that, i guess. Ultimately, im nervous yet excited to see which path we take. Where its going to lead us. Its scary not knowing whats next. Im very blessed to have such an amazing man as the father of my children standing next to me who wants to step up and be everything he can be; what he's willing to sacrafice to take care of our family. I love him with all my heart. i know he'll make the right decision, & we'll overcome whatever obstical stands in front of us.

Poem of the day:
TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

-Robert Frost
(mikes favorite)

Friday, February 19, 2010


I have been using live journal lately. But blogspot seems to be where its at! So imma try this thing out and see how i like it :) My life isnt always eventful, but its worth living! My posts arent always going to have meaning or be exciting, but if your going to follow me, dont judge. I am my own person :) Xo.

My quote for today:
"Life can be like a roller coaster,
and just when you think you've had enough,

and your ready to get off the ride, and take the calm, easy merry-go round, you change your mind, throw your hands in the air,

and ride the roller coaster all over again.
Thats exhilaration...thats living a bit on the edge...thats being ALIVE."
-Stacey Charter